Harith, Harith, you need to remain patient.
You can get through this.

Its EARTH HOUR, and my mother is using the vacumm cleaner so late in the night -.-

Today had religious class and i have to say the new teacher rocks. He's so funny and packs with lots of good old stories. Went to my grandparent's place as usual every saturday and had fun meeting my cousins. My mom even brought along my cute little baby cousin back home with us and she's going to overnight at our place. So i'm having alot of fun playing with her.

Field match up is coming soon for me. I haven't been playing field soccer for ages. I now have to really work on my fitness. Well thats about all for now, heard that the guys will be having a gethering tommorow at wee teck's house. Can't wait to crash in with them.

And oh btw, this song is hamster dance and it rocks. :D

I've decided to start blogging again. I know this is the probably the 10th time i've said this, but yeah, i'm saying it again. This time round, i'll try to keep it going for as long as possible. I know also that due to my inactivity at this blog, i've lost a handful of my usual active blog readers. But who cares, i'll just blog for the sake of keeping this site alive.

The month of March is coming to an end. In a few days time, it'll be the beginning of the 4th month of the year 2009. Like every other year, i'll occasionally take a trip down memory lane and think back at what i've been doing so far this year. Somehow or rather, this year the feeling seems so different. Everything looks colourless and there is no air of excitement or whatsoever like i do get each and every 18years that has passed. I've been wondering why is it like this, is it due to the changing me, or issit due to something else? Till now, i still can't find an answer.

The year 2008 was the worse ever year for me. Its a year where i have to deal with losses. Its the year where i had countless number of sleepless nights and its also the year where i've cried out probably more than a few litres of tears. When the year 2009 began, i made a resolution to myself that i would breakthrough from the year 2008 and start afresh once again. But that never really happened. Somehow or rather, i brought along the agony, the saddening thoughts and the miserable emotions from the year 2008 into this brand new year. Then again, the darkest hour of the year 2008 came in the final third of the year. Thus it is not surprising the post troubles and problems are being dragged into the next year.

Life just feels so different since the year 2008. Everything seems to have changed so fast, that it pushed me down on my backside. I took quite some time to get up on my feet again, but after that, everything around me seems to have changed. Something is missing in my life and i'm not sure what that is. Life sure is full of challenges. But sometimes you get over those challenges, only to find yourself facing a much greater challenge. And God knows what comes next.

hanyalah cintaNya
yang amat ku harapkan
tiada lain yang jadi rayuan
namun Dia Maha Mengerti
tak mampu insan bersendiri
menempuh dugaan yang menguji
betapa sucinya kasihMu Tuhan
betapa agungnya kebesaranMu
diri ini mengharapkan cintaMu
kekalkanlah rasa kehambaan ku

i can't hold on.

Again today i let myself down.

I wasn't able to contain my emotions and began ranting about things that would make others listening it feel uncomfartable. I'm terribly sorry to that person. I didn't mean to rant at all that, i just wanted to have a good talk with each other. But somehow my emotions get in the way, and i'm fully to be blamed for that. I'm really sorry, i promise i will try my best to not let it happen again.

do i still have a place?

Well, for some reason i decided to try and revive my already dead blog.

Honestly, i had forgotten how to blog. I had forgotten about the style of writing i use to blog, and all that. So i guess its never too late to start a new? Life has never been so mundane. But atleast there are still things around which never fails to lift up your heart and soul. Life is indeed difficult at times, but i believe hardships won't last forever. And there must be a good reason behind everything. I must be strong, for a future holds ahead of me. And its up to me to fight and breakthrough from this void, to be able to touch that future with my own two hands. I need strength and i'm thankful to God for everything that He has done for me.